3 January 2011

The Sounds of 2011

Here we go again, the BBC at its patronising best ‘guiding you’ towards the acts it believes will make it big in 2011, as selected by over 100 so-called music industry ‘tastemakers’. The strange thing is that many on this list of 15 finalists, and no doubt the final 5, have already been played to death over the last 12 months on BBC Radio 1 and 2. Let me give you just one major example in Essex singer/songwriter Jessie J. Now she’s got a strong voice and apparently has written songs for other artists (not sure if ever used though). The following song has been blaring out from Radio 1 day-in, day-out for many months and no doubt is the reason this young lady has been short-listed and already won a 2011 Brit:

JESSIE J - DO IT LIKE A DUDE LYRICS

Stomp stomp I’ve arrived
Drop the beat, nasty face
Why ya lookin’ at me?

Flyin’ flyin’ flyin’ flyin’ through the sky
In my spaceship
I’m an alien tonight

Dirty dirty dirty dirty dirty dirty sucka
You think I can’t get hurt like you, you motherf….

I can do it like a brother
Do it like a dude
Grab my crotch, wear my hat low like you

Do it like a brother
Do it like a dude
Grab my crotch, wear my hat low like you

We can do it like the man’dem, man’dem
We can do it like the man’dem,
Sugar sugar sugar
We can do it like the man’dem, man’dem
We can do it like the man’dem,
Sugar sugar sugar

Boom Boom, pull me a beer
No pretty drinks, I’m a guy out here
Rollin’ rollin’ rollin’ rollin’ money like a pimp
My B I T C H’s on my d*ck like this

Dirty dirty dirty dirty dirty dirty sucka
You think I can’t get hurt like you, you motherf….

I can do it like a brother
Do it like a dude
Grab my crotch, wear my hat low like you

Do it like a brother
Do it like a dude
Grab my crotch, wear my hat low like you

We can do it like the man’dem, man’dem
We can do it like the man’dem,
Sugar sugar sugar

We can do it like the man’dem, man’dem
We can do it like the man’dem,
Sugar sugar sugar

Boys, come say what you wanna
Boys, you need to lick my dollar
Boys, gettin’ hot under the collar
Holla holla woah

Boys, come say what you wanna
Boys, you need to lick my dollar
Boys, gettin’ hot under the collar
Holla holla woah

I can do it like a brother
Do it like a dude
Grab my crotch, wear my hat low like you

Do it like a brother
Do it like a dude
Grab my crotch, wear my hat low like you

We can do it like a brother
Do it like a dude
Grab my crotch, wear my hat low like you

Do it like a brother
Do it like a dude
Grab my crotch, wear my hat low like you

We can do it like the man’dem, man’dem
We can do it like the man’dem,
Sugar sugar sugar
We can do it like the man’dem, man’dem
We can do it like the man’dem,
Sugar sugar sugar

Do it, do it like a dude
Do it, do it low like you
Do it, do it like a dude
Do it, do it like a dude

What the fuck does all this mean. No you’re right, it absolute garbage albeit with catchy choruses. Not only that but a white girl trying to sound like a West Indian is laughable. But there she is and likely to come out on top of the final 5 BBC list.

Here’s another heavily BBC airplayed song, this time by Nero called ME AND YOU:

Are you ready do you know?
I feel it too
Are you ready I’ve got to show
I feel this for you
[2x]

I feel this for you [3x]

Are you ready?
Are you ready do you know?
I feel it too
I feel this for you
[2x]

I feel this for you

Oh yeah are you ready?
Me and you
[2x]
Me and you [3x]

Are you ready?
Are you ready do you know?
I feel it too
I feel this for you
[2x]

I feel

Good heh?