How Randy ‘the Ram’ Robinson gave Sunset Strip some credibility: ‘Watch this movie. Love this movie. Tell all your friends to watch and love this movie’

Why won’t people listen to me? Is it because I’m far too passionate about my subject matter? Am I the boy who cried wolf or is it simply that ‘The People‘ (a collective noun of ‘The Man‘) are all far too busy with inconsequential things like football and lawn-mowers to sit up and take notice of this potentially life changing event?

There are two points that are an absolute certainty that we need to clear up before we continue. It may be early days to proclaim The Wrestler the greatest movie I have ever seen but nothing else has even temporarily knocked The Wicker Man from its top spot since I first saw it. That’s quite a remarkable 25 year stint for a movie that many proclaim to be childish nonsense. Is it mere coincidence that those same people are directing those very same criticisms at the new king of the mountain? The other bone to chew on is that in my personal twenty greatest movies of all time, we find at number eight, Angel Heart and at number 18, Johnny Handsome. Those of you educated to the very highest of standards will know that Mickey Rourke is in both of these.

So to recap, one of my favourite actors ever is in a film about my favourite non-music related subject ever. It’s a no brainer. Or is it? I was worried to the core about the general release of the damn thing. It ticked two boxes with a magic marker but it could have been a dog of a movie causing me to wander the streets under a large brimmed hat until it had all blown over. Then I saw it. Twice. Back to back and I would have done a third screening if there had been one. (The only other movie I’ve ever done that for was Death Wish 3 and that was because I fell asleep. I think I fell asleep the second time as well but you get what you pay for right?)

In the opening scene - which for the sake argument we’ll say lasts a minute and half - we find Randy driving his van. Mickey Rourke looks awesome. The man could walk out of that van and take centre stage at Wrestlemania this year and nobody would bat an eyelid.

What’s this we hear in the background? Is it… could it really be.. yes it is! That’s Quiet Riot and Bang Your Head (Metal Health)! I turned to see if the guy sitting next to me was smiling as much as I was but he was wearing a tie and was sporting a notepad so I didn’t bother. I did however reach over and pull his tie really tight up his Adam’s apple (a popular sport in my daughter’s school known as “pea-nutting”) and then moved seats.

Quiet bloody Riot! Considering those guys were at the forefront of the (cock) rock revolution that brought legions of bands out of Los Angeles in the mid 80s, their legacy is largely glossed over. This is mostly because after their first album that they had about ten years to write, the rest were generic cannon fodder, but still. When their main man Kevin DuBrow passed away in November 2007 of a cocaine overdose, the news by-passed most of the rock community as inconsequential trivia. For crying out loud - the guy lay there for six days before anybody noticed. Cobain bought himself the front page of the word’s media for longer than that. DuBrow got little more than a byline in hardcore rock forums. I never had much time for them, but recognising their place in the grand scheme of things is respect enough.  Within the context of the The Wrestler, director Darren Aronofsky sure knows what this stands for. Metal Health is more than just a fan-boy slice of inane grinning at your pals. It’s the ultimate has-been song. Not a wanna-be song - but a has-been anthem. If Aronofsky had been looking for Quiet Riot kudos, he would have plumbed for Cum On Feel The Noize, a far better known song both amongst the world at large and the rock community.